“At that moment, you’re not thinking about cancer”
Standing knee-deep in the cool waters of the Great Lake Stream in Maine, Paul Allain was calmly holding his fly rod when he felt a gentle tugging on the end of his line. Then came another tugging. An unfamiliar tingling seemed to trickle into Paul’s fingertips as he squeezed the cork grip a bit tighter. In what felt like a ‘now or never’ moment, he lifted straight up and watched as the rod suddenly bent.
“Hey, this guy’s catching his first salmon!” Paul’s buddy, Mike, shouted to their two other companions fishing in the stream.
Paul was too lost in excitement to notice the guys rushing over. He tightened his grip on the rod once more and started reeling in the line like an excited young kid. A few moments later, Paul was holding up a beautiful landlocked salmon and smiling for a photo with his friends, Mike and Bruce.
“When I look back at that memory—and I have that picture on my desk—it really tells everything you need to know about Reel Recovery. At that moment, you're not thinking about cancer… you are there with these two unbelievable gentlemen who are helping you try to forget about your cancer. And that's what that memory has for me,” Paul said when reflecting on his first fly fishing retreat with Reel Recovery.
Paul was (and still is) living with an aggressive form of prostate cancer when he found out about the free fly fishing retreats that Reel Recovery hosts for men affected by all forms of cancer.
“I just was flipping through Facebook and it caught my interest. I applied for the retreat in October of 2022. I was excited about going. I love the outdoors. I love to fish, and it was an opportunity for me to be with other men that have cancer.”
Paul didn’t shy away from expressing his excitement for the upcoming retreat. He encouraged his close friend, Lou, who was also living with cancer, to sign up for the retreat. Then, while shopping for a fly rod at Cabela’s Sporting Goods, he told the salesman named Tom about the retreat he was going to attend.
“I went there to buy a fishing rod because I didn't even have a fly-fishing rod at that point. I told Tom about Reel Recovery and he shared with me that he was a cancer survivor. So here he is selling me a fly rod and flies, and he had cancer. I suggested he go online and apply, and he also was accepted. So, the three of us went up together and shared the three days together.”
Paul never anticipated how meaningful that retreat in southern Maine would be. As exciting as the fly-fishing was for him, the most impactful aspect for Paul was simply having the opportunity to spend time with other men who were impacted by the same disease as him.
Talking about your cancer diagnosis isn’t easy. For many men living with cancer, even when you want and need someone to talk to, it can be very difficult to find someone who can empathize with what you’re going through. As Paul explains, that’s exactly why Reel Recovery exists.
“It's not really about the fishing. The bigger part of it is meeting with other guys that have cancer. You introduce yourself and they give you some things to think about. And the fly fishing is really a side note. The reason why you're there is to mingle with guys that have a disease and open up and talk about what kind of cancer you have.”
When discussing his response to his own diagnosis, Paul admits he was devastated. He was terrified, in fact. As a self-described control freak, he was suddenly confronted by the realization that he didn’t have control over his own mortality. Ironically, it was this same realization that led Paul to find a calming acceptance of his cancer.
“Whether I die of a brain tumor or pancreatic cancer, once you accept your disease, your stress level goes from 10 to 1, because you don't have control. If you sit on the couch and get depressed, then cancer wins. Cancer can suck the life out of you. But if you live each day to its fullest, then cancer doesn't win,” Paul says.
Make no mistake, Paul’s positive outlook is not a mantra he’s adopted to escape reality. He is still living with cancer. Every three months, Paul visits the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute in Boston for blood tests. He knows with each visit the doctors might tell him the cancer has spread to his bones or hips. Despite all that uncertainty, he continues to find purpose and joy each day. He attributes a lot of that joy to the men he met through Reel Recovery who have become dear friends.
“My close friend, Lou Trottier, and Tom Dziubeck, who worked at Cabela's, we took a trip together and did some Atlantic salmon fishing. We traveled 12 hours up to Canada as a result of Tom and I meeting through Reel Recovery and we've developed a really close friendship… and Bruce Turner, he was my guide for the couple days that I fished. We're still friends to this day. He came up to Canada with me on the Atlantic salmon trip with Lou Trottier and Tom Beck.”
Paul has also taken it upon himself to make sure other men affected by cancer can continue turning to Reel Recovery for support. In the last two years, he has dedicated all proceeds from the annual charity bowling tournament he hosts to support the New England chapter of Reel Recovery, raising over $36,000 for the cause.
We are immensely grateful for Paul’s enthusiasm and generosity. We’re even more thankful for his willingness to talk openly with us about how Reel Recovery continues to motivate him every day, even on the bad days.
“I think in the world today, everybody needs to do something for somebody else. So if you are feeling crappy, go do something nice for somebody and it'll make you feel better. And for me, going on this retreat and meeting the people that I met, it made me want to do this again and give back.”
If you’ve enjoyed reading Paul’s story and would like to find out more about upcoming fly-fishing retreats, check out our Schedule.
Or perhaps you can donate now to help more men like Paul attend life-changing retreats for a much-needed break from the impact of cancer. Thank you for your kindness!